Single patent to two boys, 20 and 12. Both on autism spectrum, eldest also has ADHD and moderate learning disabilities. He’s like a 5 year old in a 20 year old’s body, very naive and retains a beautifully simplistic view on life. Both are broadly hyposensitive, actively seeking out sensory stimulus much of the time. They stim a huge amount of the time as a consequence, generating a lot of noise and movement wherever they are. Screens are a godsend when I need them to stay still for even a moment in public.
They find social cues / interactions utterly confusing so don’t really care for maintaining social relationships beyond a transactional level, “Does this person have something I want or need in this particular moment?”. The youngest literally (very fixed, literal thinking) compartmentalises his life, school friends belong in school and he’s adamant that he doesn’t want to see them in any other context, no matter how hard I try. Eldest is everyone’s friend, frequently stops strangers in the street to say hello, it’s very sweet but he’s vulnerable too so it means he can’t go out unaccompanied. He has a particular liking for middle aged blondes, if I see any on the horizon I have to reign him in and change direction!
I don’t know what the future holds for them. The youngest will probably be capable of making a life for himself, the eldest will need supervision his entire life and probably isn’t going to find meaningful employment.
My partner has two kids, I guess they’re my step kids now after 3 1/2 years of the relationship, so I get to see the sort of issues articulated by many of you. I’m glad it’s not me trying to steer them through the many minefields they face / create!